Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
