the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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