Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize