"it" just moved
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
