I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
