So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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