chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
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