I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
