we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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