I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
