Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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