we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
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