And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
