Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
