Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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