Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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