I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
you never un-have a 4some
Randomize
