You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
