it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
