who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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