i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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