i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Help me help you realize you are a moron
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
