She said her name was "party"
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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