I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize