you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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