id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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