mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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