The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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