forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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