im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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