Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
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