I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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