Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
