Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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