brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize