Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
