Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
