I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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