My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
You really coming over, don't trick.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
