think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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