I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
