People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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