i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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