She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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