Can Purell be used as lube?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
