did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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