At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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