Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
