I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
