Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
